Never Again

 

COTH’s Special Guest Poet: Kami B

I’ll never again be the same.
It’s neither good nor bad but clear
virtually evident through all the times I’ve smiled
and made it through these heart trials.
It has been fire while I’ve been cracked
it has felt like drowning but I lacked nothing.
That’s right, I’ve had everything I need
I won’t die from heartbreak. So take heed,
unless I fall in love another time,
it won’t be long before I am of sober mind.
Now that the rug was pulled out
from under my feet, never again will hurt
be welcome at the door of my heart.
Never again will I be another glass broken
with every tiny piece floating
across the lake and each is miles apart.
You just never know what you have
until now, when you discover you’ve lost
everything, including yourself.
Never again will I get caught
into losing my mind, thoughts that kept
torturing my very existence
because the former me said I can’t do this.
Never again will I love unto obsession
like I did before, how I worshipped His presence.

My ungodly possession was the relationship that was fake.
Oh how I regret every moment I equipped
Him with the strength to partake
of every opportunity to grow and learn.
How to be without, I should earn
the ability to watch him die
but I’ll never again be filled with hatred.
Never again will I stare at logs in his eye
I will work on getting my speck out
so I can see. So I can envision no doubt,
never again will pain overtake me at all.
He dropped me like a fine China plate
but God swept up my pieces after the fall.
He took His glue of love and care; and
reminded me that He is always there.
So never again can I feel bad or lonely.
Never again can I feel angry or ugly.
I know that emotionally I will never
again be the same lady,
be the same lover or wife or mother.
Through Jesus Christ I am healed
He has pulled that open lever
I’m walking in confidence lately.
Never again will I lose myself to another.
Through God’s love shall I be filled!

 

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